Saying goodbye is never easy

In the past year, we've said goodbye to three four-legged members of our family. Gracie died last May, very unexpectedly. She was ten years old.  She died in my arms and took a little piece of my heart with her. 

Last month we made the very difficult decision that life was just too hard for our Angel. She was nearly sixteen, blind, nearly deaf and very, very feeble. Arthritis made it difficult to walk. I hoped she would peacefully go in her sleep, but I came to the realization that keeping her alive was more for my well-being than hers. Life had no joy for her anymore. I  tearfully had to face the truth.

 

Then a couple of nights ago, our little Lucky man was hit by a car. He was only three years old. I'm just heartbroken that he died such a violent death. Alone. I miss the little guy so much. Every time I sit in this chair I still expect to hear his little paws running my way to snuggle up next to me. When I lay down at night I wait to hear him jumping on the side of the bed, ready to be helped up. I know the hurt will lessen and seeing his little face in pictures will bring about a smile instead of tears. I'm just not there yet. 

 

That's a quart sized can of paint- he was such a tiny baby.

 

Each of these creatures came into our lives and made themselves at home in our hearts. They had distinct personalities and quirky little qualities that made them special and lovable. I miss them so, and am so glad to have shared my home and heart with them if only for a short time.

In the span of a year, we've gone from a four dog family to just one. I loved each of them as if they were a child and my heart is surely a lot fuller because of the love and joy they brought to my life. Toby will certainly be overprotected, but he doesn't mind the extra doting and attention, one bit.

 

Man, this was a hard post to write! Looking at all those old pictures was heartbreaking. I really, really miss my sweet wet nosed babies. Sniff, sniff...

Comments

[mindy]

This broke my heart! I love my fur babies. They add so much to my life.

I am sure all of yours knew how loved they were.

[Valerie]

I don't know how you were able to type that post. I am so sorry for all of your losses! We are a big animal family -- four dogs and two cats -- and they are all our babies. We did have five dogs, but our golden retriever passed away unexpectedly last year due to a stroke. We still miss her terribly. I don't know how in the world it'll be when any of the others pass away. People never understand those of us that have lots of animals, but they are so much our family. I'm sure it's been quite the change going from four dogs down to one. My heart goes out to you!

[Sharly]

Deepest Condolences. I empathize with you.

[Karen]

I'm so sorry for your losses. It must have been really, really difficult for you. I'm also glad that you're back and hope you feel better and gain your strength back.

Hugs, Karen

[Vicki]

My heart just breaks for you right now. I lost my dear sweet Jazz three years ago Memorial Day weekend and I still mourn the loss. Animals become family. There's no if's, and's or but's about it. When we lose them, we lose family. So sad for you~ xxxVicki

[Beth]

So sorry Autum! We grow so attached to our fur babies and it is always difficult to lose them.

P.S. I am so glad you are back! I missed you terribly!

[rosamaria]

i'm sorry about all your lost! warm hugs for you.

[Chris]

I'm crying here..that is so sad. I'm so sorry. We lost of beautiful 13 year old cat in January suddenly and can totally relate to how you are feeling. We have only just got another two rescue cats. Jess will always hold a special place in my heart. I have a big picture of her on my screensaver and I say hello to her every day. Your babies had the best life with lots of love. My thoughts are with you.xx

[Jackie (Ellie Mae's Cottage)]

My heart just breaks for you. I'm so sorry to hear that you lost so many precious members of your family in such a short span of time. Many hugs and warms thoughts to you. I know they are watching you from Rainbow Bridge. -Jackie

[Jes]

I'm so sorry for your losses. It's so hard to lose these special members of your family and three in one year has to be especially tough. This posting is a beautiful memorial and these sweet little guys will always be with you.

[Brianna]

Aw man. I cried through this whole post. I am so terribly sorry for your losses. And little Lucky looked so precious. My deepest sympathies. Many of us understand that they become our children, our friends, our companions. My heart is with you. Sounds like a very tough year. Those pictures are a great reminder...

[Stacy Disarrayed]

Oh I am so very sorry for your loss. It's amazing how much those furfaces impact our lives isn't it? They may have taken pieces of your heart with them, but they've also left a bit of theirs with you...try to use them to fill in the gaps.
Now they're all your furry little guardian angels! You have so many looking over you! :)
Hugs.

[Leonie - Australia]

I am so sorry you have had such a difficult time with your health & with the loss of your little four legged friends, I hope the rest of the year is filled with good health & happiness for you.

[Annabelle]

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. It's so hard to lose a furbaby. Especially when you have to do something about it yourself...even if it's the best thing to do for them. I love all your pictures. All those sweet puppy faces.

[Annabelle]

I forgot to say that your previous post caused me to do a post on my own blog. I gave you credit for the inspiration. And I've already heard from two other bloggers who feel the same. You have started a small revolution!!

[Carol]

Autum, You are and were a very good puppy mama, You little dogs are lucky to have had you! I lost my little Chihuahua 10 years ago, I had to take two weeks off work, I couldn't stop crying. Thinking of you, Carol

[Libby]

Autum, I'm so sorry to hear about ya'lls loss! When I read your header and saw the first pic of your dogs, I though "Oh no! One of their dogs must have died" It was heartbreaking to read that ya'll have loss 3. Our pets become a part of the family don't they?

I loved your post about how commercial blogs have become. Like you, I understand that some people need to earn money from their blogs. But, my blog list has been cut short lately.

I hope that you are feeling better. Sending hugs your way!
Libby

[Cheryl]

Autum,
So sorry to hear of your loss. They are animals, but members of our families just the same. So, can understand how you feel. Sending you big hugs.
Hugs to you sweet friend,
Cheryl

[Rachel]

Oh Autum, so sorry to hear. Our sweet baby Bosun was hit by a car FIVE years ago, and it still hurts. We loved him so much. Nothing ever takes their place once they're gone - they just live on in our hearts forever.

You're definitely not alone in your grief. Hugs to you!

[Rose in SV]

Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss. how very sad.

Rose in SV

[Rita]

Sorry for your loss. I have to add that I'm thrilled one of my favorite bloggers is back!!

[rohanknitter]

Oh Autum, I'm really sorry you had to say goodbye to 3 furry friends .... It's not easy, I know.
Hugs to you.

[Patricia Clements]

Oh, Autumn, I am so sorry. That is a lot of loss in a very short time. Poor Lucky. I saved those two posts of Bayleigh and Lucky taking naps together.

[Lori Jones]

sorry to hear of your lose. I,like so many of your readers,
have lost many four legged baby's. You are so right it never gets easier,just have to remember the good time.
((((HUGS)))))

[PoMo Golightly]

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I know how much the pitter patter of puppy feet means.