It's all good...

I sit here on this quiet Saturday morning overcome with just how good it all is. My intent was to type out a quick line or two to let everyone know that Bayleigh is home and doing well. How hard is that? As I gathered my thoughts and arranged the words in my mind it wasn't long before I realized this wasn't going to be a quick one line post. Boy, I've really got to do something crafty so I can stop with the gushy emotional posts already. It has been an emotional week, a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. What is this grandparent deal? Why is it you feel everything you felt for your own children, only magnified? I can't say that I love her more than Alyssa or Casey, but I love her differently. I love her louder and brighter and just thinking about it makes my heart swell and sends waves through my chest and up to my throat and brings tears to my eyes. It was terrifying to put that thermometer under her arm and see the numbers rise so quickly. It was heart wrenching to hear the fear in Alyssa's voice when she called to tell me how worried the doctor seemed. I felt so helpless when Derek called because he had to leave the room as the nurses stuck and stuck and stuck his precious little girl, trying to get enough blood for the tests. Her temperature normalized with one dose of tylenol and was normal for the rest of her hospital stay. By Monday morning she was happy and smiling and wondering what all the fuss was about.

What was causing the big, bad fever? A urinary tract infection. Not a common finding for a such a little one, so she's going to have more testing (outpatient)  to rule out something called  VU Reflux.

I wonder now if Alyssa understands why we tried so hard to shelter and protect her, if she realizes it was out of love that we said no, or seemed too strict. This week she felt a fear greater than any fear she could have ever experienced and Derek who has been to war in Iraq and Afghanistan. I dare say, this experience was just as scary. I'm very proud of these young parents and how they weathered this first storm of parenthood.

Now as I sit here on this quiet Saturday morning, reflecting on the week's events, a busy week of ups and downs, it feels so good to take a deep breath and relax in knowing, for this moment, it's all good.

There was another exciting event this week, but that deserves a post all its own.

Comments

[terri]

my 3 year old granddaughter is named bailey...=)...i am so thankful that your bayleigh is okay...=)...a grandma's love for her grandchildren is absolutely like no other...

[méri]

I'm so glad for you. Thank heavens!
Grandma's love is a lovex2 or 3
We suffer with the little grandchild and with their parents, if I make myself understood

[erin]

i am so happy to hear that bayleigh is doing great!

[Michelle B]

Autum, I'm so glad to hear she's ok! My son had a UTI at 9 days old, then again at 21 days old, but hasn't had a problem since then. He's 8 now. :)

[Marie]

I'm so glad little Bayleigh is okay. Your post struck a chord with my as my DD had the tests for kidney reflux when she was one after having a febrile convulsion caused by a super high temp due to a UTI.

I think the whole process was harder on me than on her!! My DD hasn't had any problems since and I'm sure Bayleigh will be fine too.

xMx

[Brooke]

So glad to hear Bayleigh is ok. You think you know "love" and then you have children and realize you had no idea what love really was!

I enjoyed reading your take on being a grandparent. I imagine it being like the love you have for your own kids, minus the stress of having to "raise" them. You get to focus on the fun!

She is adorable! Keep posting pictures!!

[melissa sews]

I'm so relieved to hear your good report. Little Bayleigh is too cute with her tongue sticking out! She definitely seems to be healthy and happy. I'll keep praying. :)

[Mindy]

My daughter had a UTI at about the same age and she did end up having VU Reflux. Fortunately she never had another UTI (as far as we know) Reading your post has brought all those memories flooding back. I will be praying for Bayleigh that all her tests will come back negative!

God Bless

[rohanknitter]

She understands. There's nothing to make you understand your parents like having a child of your own.

[LittleMiss (Claire)]

"Louder and brighter" - I couldn't have said it better. That describes the feeling perfectly. Like when my daughter comes over and my grandson (now 3) comes running out from the van and yells "Danma, Danma!!" with arms stretched wide and hugs my thighs (cuz he's only so tall.) Melts me every time and is the best free anti-depressant ever.

[Susan Ramey Cleveland]

Thanks be to God for Bayleigh's return to good health. That is the sweetest picture of her! I pray that her tests come back negative. Bless you all, Autum.

[bridgette]

So good to have you back and to know that all is well.Congrats to Casey. What's happening with his military dream?

[Carla]

I'm so happy that B is home safe and sound. Yes-there is nothing worse then when your little ones are sick. Congrats to the graduate!

[Elaine]

So glad baby Bayleigh is doing great and congrats to the graduate. What happy and exciting times in your family!

It's amazing how much we love our grandbabies. My friend and I became Nana's about two weeks apart. We both say if we had known how much fun grandbabies were we'd have them first!

Perhaps our magnified love for them is because they have their own special love in our hearts plus the fallout from the love we have for their parents who one was our own baby. I hope that came across right...not sure just how it should be worded to make sense.

[Mean Mommy]

I'm so glad Bayleigh is doing better. She's a sweet little thing.

My baby girl went through the same thing this time last year. Her fever soared, too, and they had some trouble pinpointing what was wrong. Turns out she had a UTI, and after testing was diagnosed with Kidney Reflux. We manage it just fine, and often kids outgrow it. I hesitate to say it's not a big deal because anything wrong with our little ones is a big deal, but I do know it could be much, much worse. I'll keep you in my thoughts!

[Lil' d]

I'm so glad that she's doing much better. Those wee babes really know how to scare people.

[Somer]

I had severe Kidnay Reflux as a small child that I had suregery to fix and I now am 32 and have four children. One of my daughters had a mild case and outgrew it. So worst case senario isn't too bad. I'm glad she is doing well now. Hospital stays are so scary. You are in my prayers.

[Tonya Richard]

I am so glad Bayleigh is ok! It is so scary when one so little is sick : (

[Dana]

I am glad Bayleigh is doing well. Nothing is as scary as a fever.

[Kristin]

I am sending all my warm thoughts, hugs & prayers for comfort, strength, and peace your & your family's way. It is so scary when the little ones are sick and they can't tell us why. I'm so glad that they figured out what was going on and helped her so well. My youngest had reflux (upper GI) when she was a baby. its different from the type of reflux your'e talking about might be a possibility but it required some changes (her laying at an incline, special formula, etc). I'm here if you want to talk/vent/cry- HUGS!!!

[Faith]

So glad that Bayleigh is okay. Praise the Lord. He does hear our prayers! Congrats and best wishes to the grad. Such a handsome family you have.
xo, Faith

[Thimbleanna]

Yay! Bayleigh's all better. Hopefully those tests will turn up nothing. Congratulations to Bayleigh's uncle!!!

[mijk]

speaking form my experience she knows she really knows. She doesn't know why grandparents allow there grandchildren to do anything they were e ver allowed.. SPeaking rfrom personal experience again..

[Joleo]

So glad to hear she's doing well. Fingers crossed for the test results.

[peggy]

Hi, I just became a first time grandmother 4 months ago, I sooooooo appreciate how you feel, you say what I feel and so elegantly! Being a grandparent is a whole new world, needing new carpet is so NOT important anymore, you know what I mean! Take care, Peggy